.....'Splainin to do...

Mille's back is still hurting. We were scheduled to have our chrch photos taken today. This would be the first time ever that she has participated in this annual event. Her back is hurting so bad that she has declined again to have her photo made with me. She told me to use the same old "Blow-Up Doll" that I've used in the past. I originally purchased her because she looked like she was singing in the church choir. She (the doll) is a little wrinkled, so I am going to get out my bicycle pump. I tried helium once but it took several St. Stephen ushers with high ladders to grt her down from the ceiling after I fell asleep during the sermon. (NOT A.B.)

Okay, Okay..about the "sleeping birds." (see last blog) I can explain. Notice the kind of birds they were? Hmmm?

FYI, they were "Cedar-Waxwing." Normally the Cedar-Waxwing is a very responsible member of the bird family. They are upstanding birds in the community. You don't get a name like "Cedar-Waxwing" without proving yourself. They come from good neighborhood trees..are faithful to each other and are far removed from "Grackles." In fact, there has never been a Waxwing poop on a car. (see car-pooping birds@snopes.com)
It is also a fact that some distinguished birds at this time of year like to eat red berries. Red holly berries in fact, will intoxicate birds.

This particular night, these two Waxwings stopped off at the local pub, "The Branch" and had a few.

Alas, as they walked home (to avoid an FUI)they spotted a saloon, "The Hair Ball Pub." They looked at each other, flexed their 'drunkin wings and hit the swinging door, slamming it open to the astonishment of 20 of Mille's feral cats. "Anyone here want to try taking on a couple of Waxwings, you bunch of 'losin, cat-nippen, flea 'ridden feral felines?"

See Dallas Morning News Metropoltan:

"Intoxicated Waxwing couple found dead in Pub alley. K-911 was called and German Police dogs are investigating. Fowl play is suspected. One cat who wanted to remain anonymous said, "This incident supercedes "The War on Terrier."

Governor Perry just issued a warrant for the arrest of anyone who made the puns in this article. Apparently that's a capital offense in Texas.

Trick Winter

Mille’s back is out so the wire classes are just a dream right now. She is still busy making everything from crosses to rattlesnakes, jalapenos to hands with hearts. However, her pain level is increasing so I am putting her back in bed.
You must understand, without Mille, how can I write like Linda Bailey-Smith?

Oh well, here goes,
This February day is very still and cold. This has been a trick Winter. Very mild compared to most Winters in Dallas. Our lawn needs mowing but with Mille's back being in such pain she will have to get better before she tackles that. I tried to attach her walker to the mower but she resisted. She hasen't even cleaned the gutters she hurts so much, bless her heart.

When the air is only in the 40's and the sky is grey (our favorite British spelling) it seems colder than it it really is. It is a moist feeling that invades the marrow of our bones. Our flowers haven't noticed it though..therein lies "the trick" Winter.

Okay, I wanted to show you what our back yard "might" have looked like with our unusually warm weather. I searched my photos for a picture of a flower. Two years ago I took one in San Diego, a yellow rose. Just pretend.

Several months ago, our beloved "Marky" dog showed signs of heart failure. We have had him for 14 years at least. He wandered out one night and he went under our deck and crossed "The Rainbow Bridge." We originally found him in "The Hood" yet he became rather "preppy after awhile. Marky was our Alpha dog no matter the size of the others.

With Marky's departure, we have Bradley and Mary-Mary left. I shouldn't say that since Mille feeds every feral cat in Dallas county. Every morning there is a line of cats taking a number, waiting for breakfast. With the help of our good neighbor, we trap them and she has them fixed. FYI, when they are fixed they cut one ear at an angle. This way we know which ones have been trapped and fixed.

The "clipped" ear is especially attractive to the Tomcats that are afraid of family responsibility. Oh they show up at night with their top hats and canes and with their Bing Crosby voices just crooning away..."When the blue of the night...meets the gold of..." One Tom actually had a pipe.

Next blog: Mille Feeds The Rirds

Oh stop! I'm sure they are just asleep! (..right next to where Mille feeds the cats...)

..of Dogs and Wire

Not that anyone of you are waiting with baited breath for another blog but I DID try to blog the other day. I used my PS 2 IBM computer from 1989 and it didn't work. I spoke with Linda Bailey. She is "old Bob Smith's" better half, the one that got Mille (pronounced Millie) inspired to get ME to start blogging again. Mille loves Linda's writing and wants us to share some of our life with others.
Linda asked me if I had Photo Shop. I said that my computer is so old it only had "Etch-a-Sketch." I told her that if I wanted to post a picture I had to try and remember the image and draw it. She pointed out that my computer needs updating.

Now I am using Mille's computer. All I have to do on her computer is to think of what I want to say, so I have to be very careful as I stare at the screen. "Wow!" I had to erase that one...okay, I'm back.

What started this, as I said, was Mille reading Linda Baily's blog. She loves Linda's writing. Mille pointed out correctly, that I only write kind of negative self-indulgent things in the name of humor. Exxxcuuuuuussssseeee me? Oh...that's right..I do...Sorry.

Mille wants me to write of our family on Wyatt Street. What 'th?

First of all..Mille teaches and sells her wire art in Garland at a consignment store. I suggested that she teach a class for the parishoners and friends at St. Stephen. She said that wouold be nice. Then I had to get permission from Dick Benson, who is in charge of teaching classes at the church. He asked me the question: "Is this non-profit?" Okay, he does not know Mille at all...and I am still in the church parking lot thinking of how to answer this without hurting you-know-who's feelings.

She has never made a profit. She does this because of her love of art. Remember, she was/is a florist also.

Most of the week at our house is Mille sitting on the floor twisting wires and making some real neat things. Things that we will share as time goes by and I figure out how to put photos of her neat things on this computer.

Secondly, we will write about our dogs. We rescue dogs. We have had as many as six but now we only have two...(R.I.P. our beloved Marky this year.) Due to our age we are unable to handle six again so now we try not to make eye contact with lost dogs.

Now that I think I have figured out Mille's computer, we will continue this soon for whoever is interested in "The Fennig Family of Wyatt Street"

Autumn Leaves...and me too...

Well, it has been a long while since I added anything to the blog so I thought I might check in. I re-read my Christmastime blog and think I failed to mention that the Cricket was dinner for the tarantula which makes the story darker...yet somehow funny. (Unless you were Mr.Cricket)

So...I have been telling Mille for a long time now that I would like to move into a retirement home...no yard, three meals, new friends and all. I envisioned myself doing a standup comedy bit every evening because no one would remember my jokes from one night to the next night so no need for new material.

I would start with: "Say, what's up with those heating pads? Does the pad try to escape from the cover at night or is it the other way around?" Then the next night I start the same way with the same joke. I would at last, be a hit comedian. (I told Uncle Don about this and he reminded me that my endevour would work two ways...I would not remember telling the same joke either...just like now)

Through the cancer foundation where I work, I met a couple that sold their house in Lake Highlands and moved into Autumn Leaves.
Fascinated, I went to visit them the other morning.
"Holy Leaves Fatman!" There were 1,000 old fat men like me with the same baseball cap, telling stories and being the hit of God's Waiting Room. It was like me walking
into the Fun House at The State Fair of Texas. All those mirrors! Everyone was me! I found myself in Old-Man-Hell! 1,000 Stan Fennigs!! Like Pogo said, "I have met the enemy, and it is me!"
I ran home, kissed the yard, the dogs and Mille. I honored my young neighbors and vowed not to speak aloud ever again. I won't even go to Barbec's anymore. Too close. Phew! That was too close for comfort. Now safely at home I can mow the yard, pet my dogs and paint stuff.

Next Victim ...

This was from the announcements on 01/25/10 about 01/22/10 game against Richardson:

Last Friday night, 5A Richardson High School, was dethroned as they incurred the wrath of Coach Fennig’s Dedicated Disciples of Doom. The Eagles were shot down in their own stadium 2 to 1 and were left in dismay at our Raiders prowess and undefeated record.

Sunnyvale opened the scoring in the first half with the solo and mercurial effort of Tucker Ray, whose blinding speed down the right side, deep into Richardson territory set himself up for what is certainly a candidate for “goal of the year”. While at a full sprint, Tucker fired a right-footed shot, 90 degrees to his left, just before the end line, arcing the ball professionally over the tips of the keeper’s outstretched arms and gloves. The ball then sailed unimpeded along its majestic trajectory to the far post, where it ducked under the horizontal cross bar. With an audible “Dink!” the ball kissed the vertical bar, crossed the plane of the goal, and wrapped itself in the side net. The Raiders never looked back.

In the second half, Henry “Baby Hippo” Sales, shined with his first ever goal as a Raider. His perfectly placed header off a deflected shot left the Richardson defense frustrated and confused. Even Henry’s goal celebration was worthy of praise.


Richardson did manage to score a consolation goal late in the game but it was far too little, far too late.


If there were any serious threats to the Raider goal, they were quickly dispatched by the heroically defensive tactics of Matthew Kellogg and Michael Schiller.



Tonight, Coach Fennig and the Raiders soccer team march into Bishop Lynch stadium where the Friars will soon see the error of their ways

No Quarter---Not ONE!

As advertised last week, Coach Fennig's team did not offer even one quarter to the Richardson's soccer team. As he said, "Give no quarter!"

Two-Nil in the latter part of the game in favor of the overpowering Raiders of Sunnyvale, Coach Fennig allowed a "Mercy" Goal. He yells, "Freeze" and his team stops motion in the last position or posture they were in. Then in an act of kindness, being the gentleman that he is, the Coach hands out a GPS to the opposing team which enables them to find their way to the Sunnyvale goal.

Everyone left happy, Richardson was not shut out (Thank you Mr. Fennig)and the Raiders left undefeated.

Go Blue.

Coach Fennig and "The Unforgiven"

From Michael Fennig to his Dad...Oh..well I'll be...that's me:


Dad,
The Sunnyvale soccer team had a game last night in Commerce. This was the announcement that I composed this and was read to the high school:

Last night, the Raiders soccer team proved once again that they are a force to be reckoned with. The Commerce Tigers made a fatal error by scoring a cheap, initial goal, which only infuriated Coach Fennig’s squad. The Raiders responded by scoring three, unanswered goals in the second half, severely punishing Commerce for their grave mistake. The first goal was credited again to forward Tucker Ray, who professionally chested down a beautiful left cross from Isreal Quiroz, and set himself up for a perfectly placed shot, which soared just inches off the ground into the near corner, mesmerizing the keeper and the entire defense. Isreal Quiroz, whose skill alone wrought havoc all night long on the Tiger back line, silenced the Commerce bench with assistance from Tucker Ray’s precision pass from the right side, slotted home a sizzling left footed shot, which rendered the keeper’s lunging dive futile. If there was any doubt as to the superiority of the Sunnyvale squad, all questions were answered when Nils “The Swede” Randerz, took a direct free kick from mid-field (yes, MID-FIELD). The power and ferocity of the shot manifested itself as horror on the Commerce keeper’s face as he performed the obligatory yet innocuous, one-footed shuffle backwards, hoping in vain to redirect the earthbound missile. He was unsuccessful. The Raiders defense must also be credited for performing above and beyond expectations.

Next week, the Raiders take on Richardson High School, who last year took advantage of a fledgling Sunnyvale soccer team. Coach Fennig has since dubbed the Richardson soccer team “The Unforgiven” and has ordered “No Quarter”.

....South. Ravinia


I spoke to Darlene Richie on her birthday. At least I thought that was the one I was speaking to...I get mixed up with those Johnson girls. She was quick to point this out. She said, "I don't think you ever really learned our names." "Daion," I started, "Darlene," she corrected.
711 So. Ravinia Ave., an address that is forever etched into my memory. I practically lived there during my teen years. Wardell, Lucille, Don, Dale, Doyle, Vickie, Daion, Darlene....all part of my family yet the names of the girls escaped me, or for some reason I just could not keep them in order with their faces.
I told Darlene that it was not my fault that I forgot their names. In fact I didn't forget their names, I just couldn't attach the right names to the correct sister. There was Darlene, Daion and Vickie. No, that's not right. Vickie was first. Vickie? What 'th?
(i before e except after c)

Yesterday I sat in a booth at the Bamboo Palace chatting with Charles Richie, Darlene's husband.
The place was filling up quickly as the noon crowd moved in to take advantage of the authentic ancient Chinese buffet food such as the fried Asian chicken wings and "Ming Dynasty pot stickers."

Ancient Chinese music played overhead as CNN blared from the two 52" TVs competing with the authentic Chinese music. CNN told us of another shooting at a Federal Building.

Over the noise, I told Charles of my trouble with the Johnson girl's names, and the conversation I had with his wife, Darlene. I told him that I would probably blog about this soon. First, I added, I am going to memorize their names.

Then it happened!

Innocently, Charles said, "Stan, that's not their names. That is their middle names. Vickie is the only one who goes by her first name."

All sound ceased. The televisions turned themselves off. Chopsticks were dropped. Three undercover police officers shoved their chairs back and pulled their guns. All customers were frozen in time, mid-bite. Noodles hung in mid air.

Charles continued, "Stan, they are Vickie Dian, Linda Darlene and Wanda Daion. Just call them, Dian, Wanda and Linda...that way you won't forget."

Charles wiped his mouth with an ancient Chinese napkin and left.

Oh, eventually we all returned to normal. Guns were holstered, televisions came back on, chopsticks clacked, noodles dropped, biters bit, but no one ever spoke of that day again.

The "Stare..."

It was Christmas morning and I had set up my "Skype" equipment as instructed by daughter Wendy. A good time was about to begin with my grandchildren and I on the computer talking and seeing each other all the way from Bethlehem, Pa. to Dallas, Texas.
As a surprise I had purchased a nose and glasses party favor for the event. I was sitting at the kitchen table preparing to call Wendy and tell her I was ready when I noticed that the nose and glasses (with mustache) were awfully small. In fact, they turned out to be very small...probably for very small children.

I sat at my kitchen table wearing my Homer Simpson PJs, my Spongebob Squarepants
T-shirt, a black wool stocking cap and my nose and glasses. The T-shirt was a gift from Jakob and Paige for Christmas. Spongebob's eyeballs sat right over my "Lupron" induced man-breasts, giving his eyes a 3-D look.

I turned to Mille and said, "These darn little nose and glasses make me look stupid." I put my real glasses over the nose and mustached glasses. I looked down watching for a Skype notice, I tried putting my real glasses under the other ones. I tried to look at the snow out the back window. With both glasses I turned to Mille. I tried to focus. I realized that she had been staring at me all this time. She slowly shook her head and said, "Yes, Stanley, it is the size of the glasses that make you look stupid." She doesn't always agree with me...perhaps she was overwhelmed with the Christmas spirit...

Sleep walking dog!

State Fair '09

The Fennigs of Wyatt Street are preparing the extra bedroom for company in October. Dora McCann (My lovely sister) and Richard (My brother) are coming to join us at the State Fair of Texas...and we might get "pretend" tattoos.
Last year...or was it the year before...? I took them for the first time at the Fair and we did get tattoos and won lots of prizes and dolls for sis...
The most interesting thing about the visit was that my sister and brother noticed right away that Big Tex seems to have a gluteous minimus. He cannot sit down if he wanted to. We discussed having a fund raiser to buy him a butt.
Oh well, since this is the very first time I tried to create a blog I had better quit for now.

When the bird seed is gone...The Pitt is in the house

Okay, okay...we failed to find a taker for our "Poodle" because he looks so much like a Pitt Bull. Now what to do...
Anywhoo...we are going to keep Bradley...Brad for short...Brad Pitt for shorter... It took him about 20 minutes living in our back yard to figure out how our other dogs enter the house through our "invisible" wall. He studied it hard and then tried it...success..he actually came in and jumped on my bed and woke me up as if to say, "Hyuh-huh! I figured it out...'ya just trust that your molecules will pass through and here I am." In case I failed to mention it-our other dogs do not like having a Pitt in the back yard, let alone inside the house.

I then had to push the large tubs of bird seed that we keep for our back yard against the doggie door to keep Bradley out... He continues to push against the door and tubs and tries to move it...yes, and therein the title of this blog.

Merry Christmas by Jiminy!

I am still working at not losing blogs to the Internet ether and I think this one might really be an add-on.

It is now 'Christmastime, my favorite time of year and even though the season is about to wind down, my heart is still glad for our many blessings and, AND the snowfall that left us with a healthy blanket of snow for Christmas Morning. That was a first Christmas snow in the last 80+ years, or so we were told.
"Bradley" (see previous entry) and "Mary-Mary," two of our three dogs ran in circles around our yard in the snow for 15 minutes. Markey, our "coyote-looking" dog is still angry about the arrival of Brad so he just sulked.

I managed to spend the first week of December in Bethlehem, Pennsylvania with my little girl, Wendy, her husband Kurt and of course Jakob and Paige her two precious children. Can a Father have any more fun than playing with those kids and teasing with my daughter and my Son-in-Law?

My eldest son, Mike and his wife Amy decided to spend Christmas in Japan. My duties are to take care of and feed the 'critters they leave behind: Three kittens 'meowing, One German Shepherd barking, one Gecko hissing and one "Christmas Pink Toed South American Tarantula" that sits and waits for dinner in the evening...

When I reached into the aquarium and picked up a lively little cricket tonight I swear I heard him say from the palm of my hand, (in a tiny little high shrilled voice) "Merry Christmas Mr. Fennig Sir, This is so nice of you to pick me from all of my friends to wish me a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year...and just where are we going this fine wintry evening?"

I cleared my throat and said, "Uh... I...uh...Say Jiminy, let me hold your coat and hat...and you won't be needing the little cane this evening...oh, and a Merry Christmas to you too..."

Still Testing The Bogging...

Okay, I don't remember where I left of on the last blog and I am afraid to go back and look lest I lose this whole thing and start stalking me again...
I managed to post a photo of our new Poodle, JJ. The thing in his mouth may be part of the Mailman or what is left of him. Notice that I thanked all of the appropriate folks for the dog, I leave no stone unturned. Actually, the dog seems to be an American Staffordshire but my neighbors think that would not help me find a home for him. On all of the telephone poles there is that photo and a note that says he is part Boxer and part Terrier...uh-huh..I am sure no one notices JJ's Jaw.

Getting started

Here I am at a second attempt to create a blog about the Fennig Family of Wyatt Street. I never wanted to blog---I thought it to be a diary for everyone to peruse...but taking it in the spirit of my neighbor's blog I thought I might join the fray.
My first blog was a disaster. I must have missed the part where you actually insert the blog into the website. I ended up with a nice looking website without a word being published and no way back to add it again. I searched and pushed buttons with the result being that I became a follower of myself and a fan of myself but no blog. I actually seem to be stalking me ...so I gave it up until now...
It is a dreary cool and wet day on Wyatt Street but it is Fall and I wait all year for this time of year. All I have to do now is figure out how to publish this without losing it...and then how to add photos and such...